function engine_status() {
    var tech = new Array(60)

    tech[0] = "Mesh controller diagnostic passed.  System active on 3."
    tech[1] = "System bubble memory inactive due to partition fault in dimension 2."
    tech[2] = "Teragon system active, parsing, parsed, deltas aligned."
    tech[3] = "Hybridisation system collector init, active on 3."
    tech[4] = "Planar system alignment phase deltas overflowed, coalignment inactive."
    tech[5] = "Delta system evasion perfect, superoptimal, stability achieved."
    tech[6] = "Catalysers realigned, page fault, check dimension and reinit."
    tech[7] = "Status check of universe completed; 3034 errors detected, cleaning." 
    tech[8] = "Phase locker system locked down, ready on 3, active 90%."
    tech[9] = "Deck Argon processors in system state C, planar override shutdown." 
    tech[10] = "Agglomeration system in default state, user advised to not paralign."
    tech[11] = "Teragon system processor ar 83%, stand by for R15."
    tech[12] = "Closing all microsystems, closed, realign autonomous recollector and phase in."
    tech[13] = "Fourier status init 0 delta 3 threshold -73%, activating."
    tech[14] = "Parallax correction for distant objects overflowed on world phase 5."
    tech[15] = "Catalysers immediate, page deltas init, correlation checked OK."
    tech[16] = "Firing system monitors on system delta level 2, phase alignment check."
    tech[17] = "Renormalised.  Vectors now parallel - do not look down."
    tech[18] = "Deck Argon processors aligning collector, hybridisation system recheck."
    tech[19] = "Autonomous system state 3, dimension 4 active, streaming, streamed."
    tech[20] = "Vision systems recheck, immediate delta anomaly process started."
    tech[21] = "Correlation of vectors completed, renormalise state deltas for init 3."
    tech[22] = "Hybrid system go on delta 1, active -3, stable on 5, parallelised."
    tech[23] = "Phase systems checking vector 3-delta tuple complexes, adjusting system."
    tech[24] = "System bubble memory active, floating parse chips, n-tuple complex on 5." 
    tech[25] = "Vector processors complete system diag check, active on system state 3." 
    tech[26] = "Partial renormalisation complete, dimension 5 system delta override."
    tech[27] = "Teragon system delta active, process system checks locked down, phase 2."
    tech[28] = "Comms system threshold exceeded, stand by for review state 3 check down."
    tech[29] = "Matrix complete, processors active, vectors standing by for realignment."
    tech[30] = "Catalysers working on vectors, system 3 state, Fourier systems delta 1."
    tech[31] = "System monitors replace vector stack with n-tuple coaligned complex init."
    tech[32] = "Recidivism system locked down, problem solved.  Restarting universe in 5."
    tech[33] = "Lock system restart, factor 3 init, level 5 delta state realignment."
    tech[34] = "Hybrid state diagram system init restart on 3, lock state 2-active."
    tech[35] = "Deck Argon processor state 3 on restart of delta system lockdown init."
    tech[36] = "Dimension system stable, process enabled for system delta transfer."
    tech[37] = "Alignment of vectors proceeding, hybrid system at 81% load, delta -1."
    tech[38] = "Lock matrix vectors to dimension restable table, rehashing, partition 2 on."
    tech[39] = "Delta system reload from start, init fail on phase aligment check."
    tech[40] = "Dimensional stability checks complete, failed on matrix loader status."
    tech[41] = "Teragon system reports delta phase override check not performed, init 1." 
    tech[42] = "Dimension system override check reports status -3, locking deltas on."
    tech[43] = "Tangent vectors stable, system check 3 complete, normalising."
    tech[44] = "Realignment of dimension 3 complete, please lower incident vector volume."
    tech[45] = "Stack procedure failed on matrix override 2, bottleneck in phase transfer."
    tech[46] = "Matrix system reports transfer failed on Teragon unit, not responding."
    tech[47] = "Coder unit init, state 0, proceeding to state 2, system 99% free."
    tech[48] = "Alignment codes allowed on parse 3 delta stack, trace to 2 and 5." 
    tech[49] = "Deck Argon system OK, transfer of unit stacks complete, awaiting phase 2."
    tech[50] = "Phase matrix system delta aligned on tangent vectors, normalised to 0."
    tech[51] = "Hybrid system override, matrix subsystem allowed 3 vectors incomplete."
    tech[52] = "Dimension stack illegal, checking tangent system for illegal partials."
    tech[53] = "Parity system enabled, check found three 'overrun dimension' errors in heap."
    tech[54] = "Teragon system deltas allowed 3 overflow units back into parse queue."
    tech[55] = "Tangent system performing system delta check, override on channel 13."
    tech[56] = "Vector processor locked on target delta stack, trace through memory."
    tech[57] = "Microcode exception in gridding system, matrix backup restored, OK."
    tech[58] = "Spatial reconstruction instigated by loader failure on init heap 0."
    tech[59] = "System override failed, proceeding to system state 3, catastrophe avoided."

    var now = new Date()
    var sec = now.getSeconds()

    document.write('<CENTER>Mabula Engine Status: <I>');
    document.write(tech[sec % 60]);
    document.write('</I></CENTER><P>');
}